July 28, 2009 – Bill's Blog

My Angels, originally uploaded by bill kralovec.

Below is an article by Marney Keenan of the Detroit Free Press. She captures in words what I feel about the picture above. A little slice of heaven carrying Ocean out of the car seat and putting her to bed when we arrive home at night. She snuggles up on my chest and puts her pudgy arms around me. Nothing better. Nadia and I love the time we get to spend together when the kids are sleeping in the car and it is good confined family time. Thanks Marney for an excellent article.

Sleepy rides up north never go out of fashion

If I close my eyes, I think I can recall falling asleep in the back of the station wagon and having my dad scoop me up, both of us pretending that I’m still sound asleep. He’d carry up me up the stairs, which seemed so long and steep as a child, and gently lay me down on the cool, crisp sheets of my bed whispering, “There, now.”

I was thinking of this as we were coming home from up north on a recent Sunday afternoon. The four-hour drive was just long enough to talk about the highs and lows of the weekend, chow down Subway sandwiches and then read or take a nap, thanks to all the Dad drivers in the world.

I offer to relieve him: “Are you sure you don’t want a break? I’m happy to drive if you’re tired.”

He says he’s fine, and I’m silently thrilled to be off the hook.

We are in transition from the country to suburbia — from moonlit, late-night boat rides, s’mores and roadside farm stands to the grind of deadlines, traffic delays and gruesome headlines.

Mentally preparing for re-entry, which always seems sudden even after a mere weekend away, I try to nap but am not surprised that I can’t stop my brain from making lists.

I turned my head to see our three girls in the back seat sound asleep. Even Lucy, the black Lab, exhausted after all that swimming,was zoned out in a space surrounded by all the luggage.

Somehow the girls, crowded together, had managed to get comfortable enough to doze off. They angled their legs accordion-style, six knees propped in twos on the back of our seats. Pillows were smacked, folded in two and shoved in the crooks of their neck. Finally, they ditched the ever-present ear buds, and the cell phones were somewhere on vibrate. If all goes as planned, they will wake up close to our exit.

By now, they have mastered the art of sleeping in cars. After all, we’ve been driving up north with them all their lives.

We had three babies in four years, so for a while, we had two infant car seats and a toddler bumper seat in back. Nighttime drives up north were very popular. The kids would drift off, sleep the whole way and, in the magic of time lapse, only awaken once we arrived at the lake. More importantly Mom and Dad finally had a decent stretch of time to ourselves.

They, too, remember faking sleep so they wouldn’t have to change into pajamas, the patterned imprint on their cheeks of a seat belt. I remember the smell of their sweaty scalps, how their heads perfectly fit into our palms.

In the minivan days, we took out the back seat and let the kids put sleeping bags and pillows back there. And while this resides in the “what were we thinking?” category, I could look back and see the cloudy circles of flashlights dancing on the roof.

Now, they are teenagers, the oldest only months away from 20. They are all limbs, long hair and smiles that will inevitably launch a thousand ships, I know, but right now they are here, asleep, all three together, in my line of vision, cherished ever more. Better yet, our exit is still several miles away.

Many people called this book the best one so far on the Iraq and Afghanistan Wars. I can see why! I couldn’t put the book down.

Filkins spent a lot of time in Afghanistan, the World Trade Center, and Iraq, covering Bush’s “War on Terror” and it shows with the breadth and depth of the vignettes presented in the book. He may have the best overall view of the war. Filkins was embedded with US troops on many missions. As a NY Times Reporter, he got to interview not only regular troops, but the commanders and higher ups in the military, CIA, and US government. He also lived outside the “Green Zone” so he got to know many ordinary Iraqis. He also gets the perspective of the insurgents and it is amazing how he got to experience both sides of combat. The guy talked to everyone involved in the war. It gives the complete picture of war. He is also a great writer and the book has a poetic sense to it. The characters and their stories really grip you.

He was almost killed or kidnapped several times. He is deeply affected by the violence and suffering he saw, similar to many of our troops. He really brought home the great difference between what is happening in Iraq and normal, everyday life in the USA. Many of his Iraqi friends are now living in the US.

I remember when we declared war on Iraq. I opposed the war and thought it was a bad idea. I agree that it was good to get rid of Sadaam Hussein, but there are many other dictators just as bad. Why go into Iraq? The war has cost the USA lots of money, energy, and lives. Not worth it in my opinion. It is sad and tragic. I felt sorry for the troops. They are mostly young kids from small towns like mine. It is not a fair fight as the “insurgents” hide behind civilians. No nation ever wins a war of occupation. We should get out as soon as possible. The book gave the impression that there could be a war between the Shiite and Sunni sects of Islam. We are not going to turn Iraq into a beacon of freedom and democracy for the Middle East. The Islamic tribal culture is so different to ours that it would takes several generations to make any profound change. And that is only if they wanted us to change them.

The book is reviewed in the NY Times and the NY Times’ bureau has a good blog. Many conservatives in the US say that the NY Times coverage of the war is biased, but Filkins points out they have spent the most money and provided the most coverage and reflective thinking about the war than any other media. The Los Angeles Public Library also has a podcast interview with Filkins.