I read Sebastian Junger’s Tribe: On Homecoming and Belonging, on the trip from the east coast to Chicago. He is famous for his book The Perfect Storm which was made into a movie in the late 90s. I saw his excellent Afghanistan war documentary, Restrepo. The book is almost a long essay at 158 pages, perfect for a day of travel. The book resonated with me and gave me plenty to think about. Although a bit simplistic, he does make a strong argument for his point of view and the writing is clear and concise.
My big takeaway is the importance of community for our happiness. It is fundamental to our happiness to have a greater interest than ourselves and have intimate, close relationships with family, friends, neighbors, colleagues, clients, customers, etc. Junger asserts that our modern, Western lifestyle disrupts community and relationships. He takes the point of view of returning soldiers from Afghanistan and Iraq. He spent a year embedded with troops and experienced the intense camaraderie that comes from living together in a stressful situation. The affluent and urbanized society the troops come home to is nothing like they experienced in the military.
Junger goes on to give many examples and statistics, things like the high incidences of mental illness (depression, loneliness, poor health) that are symptoms of us putting extrinsic values over intrinsic ones. Our long evolution of communal, tribal living, sharing our life with extended family in dangerous environments, has shaped what makes us human.
The book details American colonists preferring to live with the Native Americans over staying in their rigid societies, or despite seeing their community being destroyed, the residents of Sarajevo missing the intensity and close connections the siege created during the breakup of Yugoslavia. (Junger was a war journalist for many years.) He sees the current Republican versus Democrat divide as the tribe wanting all members to contribute to the common good of all balanced with the need to help those who cannot take care of themselves.
The book inspired me to promote closer relationships in my work as the head of an international school. Teachers sharing ideas, frustrations, accomplishments with each other in what can be an isolating profession. Teachers going beyond the normal classroom instruction and truly getting to know their students and their parents. Reaching out to parents to help them raise their children in this age of personal technology and access to so much information, good and bad. And most importantly, all school stakeholders keeping the interest of others and the school community first. If we are all looking out for one another, all of us individually will be happier.