Trip to the USA

I want to write about the my trip home to Michigan last week and reflect on the passing of my mother. This is more for posterity sake.

It began with a phone call to my mother two weeks ago. She was a patient at the big, regional hospital in Marquette, Michigan. My dad took my mom to her usual hair appointment on Friday. He then went to help out at the church and when he returned, my mother could not get up from bed. He called 911 and eventually she was transferred from the Iron County Hospital to Marquette. She was there for several days. I talked to her on the phone once and she sounded okay, complaining of pain in her back and legs. My father said there was not much the doctors could do for her and they were looking at transferring her to a nursing home in Iron River. He said the situation was grave so I immediately made plans to fly to Michigan.

My mother was a diabetic for over 20 years. Diabetes runs in her family as many members have it. She received a kidney transplant from her brother over 10 years ago. Diabetes in the long term harms the body’s circulation, eyesight, and other vital organs. Mom was an active person and never smoke or drank. It was sad to see the debiliatating effects of the disease on her.

She kept asking my Dad what day it was and when the boys were going to come home. I live in Serbia and my brother Andy, (on the far left in the photo above) lives in Ecuador. I arrived in my hometown of Caspian, Michigan last Friday evening. On Saturday morning, we got a call from the nursing home where my mom was staying. She told the nurse that she wanted to see us before she passed away.

I went up there with my daughter Ocean. My mom recognized me and called my name. She asked for her glasses so she could see her only granddaughter. Ocean sat on the bed next to her. During the day, we stayed in her room and Dad and I helped her stay comfortable. She asked us to move her because her back, shoulders, and legs were sore. Andy arrived in the afternoon and the nurses moved her to a private room.

Her three sons, husband, and sister were with her when she passed. I held her hand and hugged her in her final moments. We all said goodbye and told her that we loved her. I promised to take care of the her grandchildren and especially to teach Ocean to be a good basketball player. My mother died around 5:00 PM Saturday.

The next few days were sad. It was good that my two brothers, Dad, and I were together to get the funeral organized. We went to the funeral home together to help write her obituary and plan the funeral. We made a large bulletin board of photos as a memory to her.

My mother suffered greatly her final couple of years. There were many trips to doctors and hospital stays. My father spent much time helping her out.

The funeral was really nice. Most of our relatives on her side of the family came as well as people from our small town of Caspian. On the way out of the church, the choir played the West Iron County High School fight song, a fitting tribute to a sporting woman who gave so much to school’s basketball program.

Nadia, Ocean, and I had to fly back the next day. We left Owen and Oliver back in Belgrade. The emails, letters, and words of sympathy from our family and friends, both here in Belgrade and the USA was overwhelming and greatly appreciated. She had a full life and passed away knowing that she had a postive impact on the lives of so many people. We will miss her.

It was also my first time in Michigan in February for many years. It was very cold (-27 C on the day we left) with heaps of snow.