Category: Family Journal

It has been so nice to have all five of us together this summer. We are combining shopping, outdoor adventure, doctors’ appointments, helping Owen, etc. Reconnecting as a family is the best aspect of summer holidays. This weekend we dropped Ocean and Nadia off at the mall in nearby Wilkes Barre and Owen, Oliver and I did a round of disc golf on the course along the bank of the Susquehanna River. The large trees and grassy areas make for a pleasant environment. The flowing river and downtown skyline make for delightful views.

We used the same strategy yesterday when we visited the town of Jim Thorpe. We drop the girls off for shopping and the boys go out and do something. Jim Thorpe is a beautiful town nestled in the Lehigh Gorge and is quite touristy. The main street is filled with unique little shops which they enjoyed. We drove across the river and hiked up to Glen Onoko Falls. Park officials closed part of the trail because they were receiving too many distress calls of injured hikers. The steep sides of the gorge combined with slippery rocks and flip-flops, caused many accidents and even deaths through the years. We did the 3 kilometer ascent quite rapidly. The falls are beautiful and I wish we had more time there to explore. We’ll definitely visit Jim Thorpe again and I’ll share some photos of the town. We like to cycle the trail which goes over 25 miles between White Haven and Jim Thorpe, but with my injury this year, we are confined to walking.

I listened with interest to Dr. David Buss from the University of Texas Austin being interviewed by Sam Harris. Buss is a psychologist with a background in evolutionary biology who researches human mating behavior. Harris and Buss were pointing out the differences between men and women when it comes to finding and keeping a mate. It is obvious because of the physical differences between the sexes, there will be differences in mating strategies. For example, women invest much energy in producing a nutrient-packed egg and the 40-week pregnancy and birth. For men, fertilization and gestation takes place inside of the female and this is not as big of a physical investment. There is a social movement to play down these differences. Because this is such an important, emotional topic for almost everyone, much of the common perceptions of differences between men and women can be backed up by evolutionary differences. However, both Buss and Harris are not excusing bad male behavior (cheating, sexual harassment, etc.) but by understanding natural tendencies developed over long periods of time, humans can overcome this to be fulfilled mates and parents.

I especially enjoyed the concept of mate value. Males are valued for traits such as income earning, kindness, emotional stability, empathy, intelligence, height, prestige/power, looks, etc. The higher one is on these continuums, the higher one’s mate value. Women are valued for much of the same things, but youth and beauty do get higher values than in men. Evidence for this is in the average age gap between men and women with marriage. In the first marriage, an average age gap of 3 years, the second marriage is 5 years and the third marriage is 8 years. As men age and gain income and prestige, they value youth in women. I was thinking on how mate value applies to my children and I think all young people should read Buss’s work to assist them in finding the right partner and maintaining a healthy marriage and family. It must be more challenging today with the internet and the many more possibilities of meeting people and comparing oneself to others. I always say that who you marry is more important than what your career field is when considering satisfaction in life. The other concept of interest covered in the conversation was the “dark triad” of personality traits that are associated with male sexual harassment and abuse. Men that rate high in Narcism (self-centered), psychopathy (lacking empathy) and Machiavelliasm (manipluating others) are dangerous, serial offenders. Most men do not exhibit the dark triad of personality traits.

Little did I think when my family came to Uzbekistan in July of 2019 that it would be almost two years later that would be finally leaving. We were not able to travel last summer because the pandemic closed the border and we were afraid that we were not able to get back. I am optimistic that this summer we’ll be able to return next month without difficulty. Nadia usually flies business class because of her lower back issues and because of my shoulder injury, we are both flying business class this time. We are on the Uzbek Airlines direct flight from Tashkent to JFK airport in New York. I do not fly business often, but when I do, I am amazed at the different passenger experience. Business class passengers use a different terminal that economy class passengers at the airport. This includes check-in, customs and boarding. We had chicken somas (an Uzbek empanada) and coffee in the restaurant. 

It is nice to have a “right-hand man” and Ahat helped with baggage and drove us to the airport. We are with mixed emotions this morning, happy to be returning to the USA after two years, but leaving our puppy, Obi behind and the fact the school purchased a one-way ticket for Owen as he graduated and will not be returning with us. He is taking a gap semester and will live with my uncle in Pennsylvania. He plans to get a job and driver’s license and experience life outside of the expatriate bubble and a get true Americana experience.  

The flight was uneventful. The direct flight to the USA is convenient. The seats were huge and we were able to sleep. The flight in economy class was 85% full. My critique of Uzbek Airways is the food was subpar and the cost difference between economy and business was too much. The attendants were thoughtful and polite. There was only 1 English movie to choose, but I didn’t care because I am not a big movie person.  We had an over 1 hour wait in the JFK passport control line. Customs officials were only in 4 of the many lanes. I was surprised no one checked our PCR test results in New York, or in Tashkent for that matter. No one also asked if we were vaccinated. We voluntarily filled out a contact tracing form for the state of New York and handed it to a table outside of the baggage area. It was very easy to enter the USA and I am proud of our country for producing so many vaccines. Our children have an appointment on Tuesday to receive their first Pfizer dose! 

We had to change plans because of my shoulder surgery so took a private transport from JFK to Freeland, Pennsyvlania where we are staying with my uncle. AJ, our New York Sikh driver made good time and we were delivered in about 2 hours. Freeland is directly west of New York City in the Poconos Mountains of eastern Pennsylvania. I was shocked at the amount of garbage on the sides of the road as we made our way through Queens and the Bronx. Congress really needs to pass an infrastructure bill. After living in Japan, America’s roads and airports are not up to world-class standards. We were excited to see the great sports stadiums of the US Open in Flushing Meadows, Citi Field (New York Mets) and Yankee Stadium. 

As I finish this blog post, I am on my uncle’s deck listening to the morning birds and it is a misty, cool morning. I learned that I prefer dry climates to wet ones. Tashkent is classified as a Mediterranean climate and that is my preferred one. However, the humid cool of the Poconos is a welcome change 

Summer is my favorite time of the year. I love the early morning sun, the hot temperatures, watermelon, swimming, easy bike rids, etc. One of the many pleasures I delight in is walking Obi in the evenings around Tashkent. Uzbeks are nocturnal and there is great people watching going through the parks with our dog. Dogs are a bit foreign to Uzbeks and Islamic culture but we are seeing more and more of them around the city. Many people at first are afraid of him, but then often they ask for photos or to pet him.

We took these photos on the Ankhor Canal near the entrance to the amusement park near the Olympic Museum. Central Asians love L.E.D. lighting and the bridge looks cool around sunset.

The government is taking stronger measures everyday to enforce social distancing. They are tightening controls of movement and limiting groups to under 3 people. Some of the guards at the school couldn’t make it across the city to work today and another teaching couple got stopped by police while walking their dogs.

I managed to go on a bike ride this morning along the canals. There were a few people exercising and a lot more police. There was a lot less traffic and so made it very nice for a cyclist. I hope I can continue to cycle everyday. No one stopped me and I tried to keep my social distance from others. The afternoon was my nap on the topchan and then some school work.

Disasters always have a silver lining and with Covid-19, I am spending more time with my family. Ocean and I made pizzas last night and Oliver and I have played a lot of table tennis. That is a funny sport. It is basically a toy version of tennis. Is there another sport like that?

We celebrated Nadia’s birthday, January 26, 2020, with a stay at the local Hyatt Regency. This is Nadia’s favorite place in Tashkent! We had a nice dinner at the Italian restaurant on the top floor Saturday evening. The next day we had a long breakfast, watched Australian Open tennis and went for a swim in the afternoon before checking out. It was a relaxing stay for us.

The Hyatt treated us right with a birthday cake in the morning!

Ocean asked me to go with her to Ice City, a new winter sports amusement center in Tashkent. We made Oliver go with us and we had a lot of laughs. I especially liked the speed skating ring. They even had an indoor bunny hill for skiers. I just love spending time with my family during the holidays.

Last night and again this afternoon, we went to the airport to pick up Nadia’s father and her sister and nephew. The Tashkent International Airport is unusual in that people must wait outside the arrivals terminal and cannot enter the building. With temperatures hovering around zero, we were uncomfortable. I really enjoyed it however, just spending time with my family, joking around and waiting with anticipation for our relatives to exit the terminal.

I had a headache today and took it easy most of the day. Yesterday however, I did get out for a ride along the canals. It was quite refreshing and I hope to ride more often during the break.